Before I had a baby, before I was married, when I was in college, I had a life group. We met once a week, swapped stories of our shenanigans and tried to encourage each other to live better lives. It was awesome and I miss those guys so much!
Now that I have a baby and a husband and a dog and a kitchen that magically creates its own dirty dishes, I need a life group more than ever. Why? Because it's nice to feel like part of a group. A group of like minded individuals with the same goals and views. A group of other adults even. Creatures who also pay bills and try to clean house and sometimes swear when angry. Humans I can converse with and have long intelligent talks with. Two-sides talks with knowledge to be gained for all involved. This is in stark contrast to the one-way grunting communication I have with Lizzie all day every day.
She cries or screams or coos or gurgles or squeals incoherently.....
And I desperately rattle off a string of possibilities to her that she can neither confirm nor deny, yet I continue to ask them anyway...
Knowing she can't answer...
Isn't it weird that we do that to babies? Talk to them like they both understand AND will retort...
Are you tired?
Are you hungry?
Do you feel good?
Why won't you sleep?
Are you dirty?
Did you just poop?
Do you wanna bath?
Do you wanna read a book?
Please be quiet.
Are you trying to drive me crazy?
Do you want to be an orphan? (I kid I kid ;P)
Sometimes a smile. Usually a stare.
"Seriously? I'm an infant. No speakezah language yet, Mom."
So yeah. When Rhiannon called and said "wanna go to Bible study with me?" I nearly choked on my coffee. Yes. YES! YES!!! My God, I want to go so badly I don't even think I can wait until Wednesday. Gimmie the study book and I will go RIGHT NOW to camp outside the building until then. It sounded like the most perfect idea since someone decided that vodka and OJ went tastily together. Sign me up!
Since Lizzie has been born, I don't get out much.
I know, right?!?!
It's just too hard to get out the house. Hauling around that kid and all her crap is a daunting task no matter where we are trying to get to. Picking up bread and milk from the Food Lion less than a mile away is equal to doctor's appointments in the next town is equal to walking on the moon. They all require the same planning and time and gear.
So I'm off and running, having finally accumulated the child and her stuff in one place. We're seated in the car and I'm putting that puppy in reverse to leave the driveway. Going to Bible Study. No shower and no matchy matchy clothes but on my way nonetheless. She's quiet and I'm relaxed. Music beebopping and head clearing. I'm so happy and excited and proud to be going that I am out of the car, laboriously crossing the parking lot and shuffled into a seat at a group table before my mind comes to a SCREECHING HALT and my palms melt into a cool gummy mess.
Ugh. So not cool feeling. Kinda nerve racking. Making irrevocable first impressions with greasy hair and postpartum baby belly still stuffed into maternity jeans. Super win. Oh well...
Eventually I settled in and then got Lizzie tucked away into the Moby Wrap. The leader quieted the group and we all opened our books and took out our #2 pencils. Every thing after that was uplifting and relaxing. It was wonderful! I talked to other grown-ups.
About SAHM junk.
It's a Stay At Home Mom's group!
I even made it there, on time, with all my cookies in one basket. I learned some things. Lizzie was good. Success all around. Very stoked :)
I can't wait to go back to the next meeting. I will try to read ahead and do the "homework" questions so my book isn't empty when we get to "share" time. Hell, I may even shower! You know, if she lets me...