Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Forgot what I was saying...

Have you missed me? I haven't been around much lately.

Oh you didn't even know I was gone!? IT WAS A RHETORICAL QUESTION PEOPLE. Jeeeeeez.

I didn't even update Daily Lizzie until yesterday-ish and let me tell you... Thank God the camera records the date the pic was taken. There were a few days where it was all I could do to pick up the camera and snap 2 or 3 pics before giving up. Those pictures can never compare to the days where I take 200 (literally) different shots and then laboriously choose the snazziest of them all to showcase.

On hairy days weeks like these, my only save is a close-up crop and a little black and white action. Think artistic. Think vogue.

Valentine's Day was very lovely. (Yes, I know it was over a week ago. DO YOU WANT TO HEAR THE STORY OR NOT.)

We ran out of milk for pancakes and coffee so I had to send Stephen to the store before either of us was fully awake. I didn't want to go and neither did he but, well, let's just say that an inconvenienced Stephen is unfortunate but a decaffeinated Gena is a ticking atom bomb so choose wisely. See also: Psychotic Rage.

So off he went, saving my coffee-morning and also picking me up an overpriced heart shaped box of chocolates. I'm trying to diet and usually not a fan of flowers or gifts of sweets but I didn't want to hurt his feelings so I ate pretty much the whole box right then and there. What can I say, I try to be appreciative....

I let him have a few pieces but then, UGH, he ate the goddammed cashew caramel cluster of awesomeness, of which there were only two and hey, I was only saving them for last, but go ahead, steal my happiness. I must have too much anyway.

He said he didn't know they were the best ones but I knew he was lying so I berated him mercilessly until I had him reduced to tears and then right before I squished his guilty heart in my fist, I told him “It's okay, Honey, but next time, just say you think my fat ass should slow down with the shoveling of calories into my cave mouth. Don't pussy foot around the facts by eating all the good chocolates. LET'S HAVE SOME HONESTY HERE!”

See also: Psychotic Rage

Thanks for my new book Gammy!

E has officially said her first word and it is dada.
I would have preferred Mama to be the groundbreaker, sure, but whatever.

I mean, it's okay that he gets to be first. He plays with her and lets her watch Call of Duty: Modern Warfare II and also forgets to put her socks on but who am I to judge. I only get up with her 1734 times a night and still breastfeed every two to three hours and, OH YEAH, also thoroughly trashed what's left of my body to bring her into this god forsaken world.....

I'm sure I was a close second and no, I am not bitter at all.
(Who needs “I told you so” when I have “Guess you SHOULDA SAID MAMA FIRST, huh?!?”.
I can't wait to use that one.)


I always brag that I am a night owl. Stephen is also a night owl. I do my best work after 10pm with a fresh pot of coffee brewing. The two of us used to stay up until 1am every night and on the weekends we would rarely roll out of bed before late noonish. So wouldn't we be so lucky as to have a child who also likes to burn the midnight oil. And she still gets up AT LEAST two times a night. Unfortunately, my rapidly aging body can no longer keep up such a schedule. I'm wearing thin.

I am eternally grateful to the baby sleep gods for allowing us a child who can be put in her crib awake and then put herself to sleep. I have no complaints there and again, 1000 thank you's. What's turning me prematurely gray is the “Hey, I've been asleep for a few hours but I'm awake now and it's 2am so pass the tequila because it's PARTY TIME! Egg-cuh-LENT!” I just don't know how much longer I can deal with this sans narcotics.

I also don't know how much longer my marriage can take it because I am so frikken tired of restraining a squirmy, flailing, shrieking infant, a mere 12 inches from my husband's head, while simultaneously shooting evil death ray eyes at him for sleeping through the whole ordeal. Seriously. HE MUST BE FAKING!

And, just like her first unaided sitting session, her first word was picturesque and poignant and by the light of the 2am moon. Dadadadadadada.....

The preciousness of it all almost burst my heart but then I remembered it was 2am and instead, burst into tears. It was a rough night.

Nyquil Anyone?

Your tears make night-owl-baby very happy. 
There was more but I don't know what I did with it......


Me: Oh, hai, did I interrupt something?
Them: *cricket* *cricket*

We are officially in that baby phase where her sweet little scream-hole is continually covered with some sort of crusty food residue. 
Like all the time.

If Mommy doesn't give you what you want, just do this..... 

Citrus is Lizzie's catnip.


My Life As Mom said...

NOW i see why Sarah loves you... you're a hoot! Love the pictures, they're adorable!

Lauren said...

I'm so sorry youre dealing with night wakings - wish I could offer advice but we're in the same boat. I just keep dreaming of the time when they're 14 and we have to yell at them to wake up before noon. Of course we will no longer be capable of sleeping in until noon because they broke us when they were infants. Horrid little creatures.

I love Lizzie's Heart Day outfit by the way.

Cynthia said...

Have you tried pumping and then giving her that bottle before her 'bedtime'? That's what we did with Isla (plus a steady bed time routine), and she's been sleeping through the night since six weeks... 6 hours straight at first and it's just increased from there.

At 7:30 it's bath time, at 8:00 it's food and cuddle time, at 9:00 it's bedtime and she doesn't wake up until 9ish the next morning. I'm sure you've already done the schedule thing though... Good luck Gena!

And I love that last picture of Lizzie... Too freaking hilarious!

Sarah @ BecomingSarah.com said...


That is all.

Oh, no. I lied. I would also like to state that Charlotte is still not babbling dada or mama. So you have a genius baby and I have a mute.

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